How to ignore a person
04.07.2023 0 комментариев
How to ignore a person
In most cases, people are interested in the question of how to attract the attention of an ignorant human. But sometimes they are forced to think about the ability to ignore someone who is intrusive and arrogant. By the way, the question is not at all idle, because sometimes neither polite refusals, nor direct conversations, nor rude attempts to cut off communication help. If you have come to the conclusion that only the lack of attention to a certain person will allow you to break off conflict relations with her, you need to act.
You will need
- Most methods of ignoring an unpleasant person come down to establishing a distance — social, psychological, emotional or geographical. Let’s consider these options.
Start by creating an emotional distance. Before taking any action, try to distract yourself, calm down. Learn to perceive an obsessive adviser or boyfriend in cold blood. This is the most difficult, but the most necessary type of distance. It helps especially well in a situation where you are forced to communicate with a person quite often. For example, if this is the mother-in-law in whose apartment you live, an annoying classmate or an unbalanced colleague. Learn to perceive his «attacks» as if from the outside. Imagine that you are the director of a movie where your offender is the main character. If he starts to provoke and piss you off, think about what angle it would be good to film the situation from, so that the emotions of the offender, offended, observers, etc. can be seen.
Try to establish a psychological distance. The essence of psychological distance lies in the ability to share understanding and acceptance. You can understand the strange desires of a colleague, but not accept them as acceptable for yourself. You are able to treat with understanding the advice of an elderly relative, but you should not take them as instructions for action. And you will need time and patience to learn how to convey to human your position. So say: “I respect your point of view for this and that reason, but I will do it my own way, because I think that this is the right thing for me personally.”
Use social pressure to influence the offender. Social distancing should be resorted to if the first two options cannot be implemented. For example, if the ex-spouse is a rowdy and a drunkard dangerous to society, one has to use the pressure of society and the influence of official authorities to protect oneself from his actions. A softer version of building a social distance is a change in social circle. Change the social circle to one that your abuser does not have access to. If you originally belong to different layers, make access to your circle impossible for him. A social circle is a kind of community into which it is difficult for outsiders to enter. This is not always good, but in your situation, society can close the doors to the wrong humanmaking it easier for you to end a failed relationship with him.
If all the measures above do not help, set the geographical distance. This is a radical method of solving the problem and should be resorted to as a last resort. For example, if a woman was a victim of domestic violence, sometimes it is possible to tear her out of the family of a tyrannical husband only by creating a geographical distance. The victim must literally disappear for a while, changing both addresses and phones, so that her persecutor calms down and stops pursuing her. Physical distance with the offender is not needed forever. Often six months are enough for the passions to subside and you can return to your usual way of life.