Unhappy love is a guest of every human heart capable of loving, in principle. And although for hundreds of years it has inspired people to great works of art, immortalized deeds, etc., meeting with unrequited love, feeling pain and bitterness, sooner or later we come to the question — how to survive this unhappy love, forget it, get rid of it, pull it out of hearts forever.
Before asking this question, answer yourself another one, only honestly — do you really not want to suffer from unhappy love anymore, as you are already used to. It sounds rather strange, but most psychologists note a certain amount of masochism in the experiences of unrequited and unrequited love. First, we are accustomed to the status of pity: both from others and ourselves to ourselves. The problem with unhappy love is that a person becomes addicted to it. And, moreover, suffering is necessary for him, like a dose of a special drug. So, for example, the first love, which, as a rule, is unhappy (or unrequited), is remembered by us for a long time precisely because of the invested emotions. Surely you added fuel to the fire, intensifying the sensations of suffering with appropriate songs, thoughts and deliberately bringing yourself to tears. Familiar? So, suffering — is it love?
Philosophers, poets and psychologists have been arguing and pondering about what love is for centuries. Most agree that true love should bring joy and a sense of self-sufficiency. If a feeling develops into addiction, pushing for humiliation and masochism, then it contradicts the very nature of love — to create. You lose your life, your opportunities, your right to happiness. And if you want to change the situation, then this is the first correct step in a series of suffering.
So, what to do if you want unhappy love to remain in the past.
How to get rid of unhappy love?
- it is important to look at unhappy love not as a sublime feeling, but as a disease. This approach will allow at least some common sense to be included:
- If funds allow, go to a psychologist for a consultation. The specialist will help you choose some techniques that contribute to the acceptance of the fact that your couple cannot exist;
- use special exercises aimed at forgiveness. Mentally imagine a loved one, ask him for forgiveness, wish him happiness, let him go;
- focus on loving the other person, namely yourself. Do everything to fall in love with yourself, discover your best qualities. Mentally hug yourself and confess your love. Explain to your inner child that you will never leave him;
- sometimes, thinking about how to forget unhappy love, we discard any thought of throwing all reminders out of life. But this is logical. Hide away joint photos and those things that remind you of your loved one;
- do not leave room in your head for sad thoughts. It’s amazing how much energy we spend on cherishing in ourselves unhappy love. After all, this feeling is not without reason compared to a fire that requires logs for heat. Only instead of good experiences, you feed your love with experiences. Is it worth spending time on this if you decide to get rid of unhappy love? Not!
Discover the world of hobbies, interesting books, foreign languages, dancing, traveling — what brings you joy, not suffering.
And, most importantly, be open to the world. Otherwise, you run the risk of not noticing the one who deserves to take the main place in your life!