10 secrets about relationships between men and women
A happy, harmonious relationship between a man and a woman is, according to psychology, a great, two-sided work on oneself, unceasing spiritual growth. But in every romantic couple, in any family, disagreements and conflicts sometimes arise. Sometimes they develop into a crisis, which is a turning point in the fate of both. For some, it happens on the threshold of family life, others experience similar situations after many years of marriage. If together, a man and a woman, treat their union as spiritual work, they will always have the opportunity to heal grievances and strengthen relationships.
Use the tips from MedAboutMe to look at marital or romantic relationships from a new point of view, change some habits, behavioral stereotypes. They will help you gain self-confidence, boost your self-esteem, and attract a partner who truly deserves love. Or reconsider the old relationship in order to put an end to them and boldly step forward towards the new ones.
Psychology offers these 10 tips to everyone, regardless of how long the relationship lasts, 50 days or 50 years.
1. Accept conflict as a normal part of the relationship.
Perfection only exists in Hollywood. Disagreements happen to everyone. Unless the partners are involved in serious problems (infidelity, alcohol abuse, drug addiction, legal problems, violence), do not cancel the relationship just because it is going through a difficult period in its development.
Trust and devotion will help overcome any life hardships.
2. Improve your own psychology
Many people behave incorrectly in a conflict situation. What many people think is “normal behavior” can actually harm the person, their partner, and others. To understand how emotionally mature your own behavior is, we recommend asking yourself a few questions:
- Was I happy in this relationship?
- Am I feeling healthy?
- Am I living my own life?
- Does my life have purpose and meaning?
If the answer is no, you must muster up the courage not only to answer these questions honestly to yourself, but also to change the situation. We advise you to talk about what worries you with a psychologist.
3. Give your partner freedom
Spouses or romantic partners are not always one. Everyone needs some physical and emotional freedom, personal space. For example, according to psychology, the healing of emotional wounds received in childhood is impossible with pressure and strict “accountability” from a partner or spouse.
If a partner asks for space, it is necessary to give him freedom. The harassment should be stopped by monitoring pages on Facebook and other social networks, interfering with his work or questioning friends. Do not focus on the life of any other person, limit yourself to your own.
4. Learn happiness «solo»
Happiness is not a relationship, a job, or a perfect set of circumstances. It hides within the person himself. A successful person exudes vitality himself. He wakes up happy, no matter the circumstances, including destructive conflicts.
To find happiness in a couple, you must first learn to be happy with yourself, acquire the habit of enjoying life. Right now. With or without a partner.
5. Work on improving your self-esteem
Only the person himself determines his own self-esteem. Too many (especially among women) curl up into a ball, take the fetal position and lose their spiritual strength, being dependent on the whim and mood of a person.
It doesn’t matter if the partner stays in the relationship or leaves, gives compliments or criticizes, self-esteem should be independent and persistent, like a non-stick coating of kitchen utensils.
6. Take care of your own interests
An adult person can fulfill his own desires, meet his needs.
- Want to take a nap? Do it.
- Craving ice cream? Allow yourself a little.
- Do you love going to the cinema? Give yourself more of this pleasure.
In partnership, you can ask one person to help meet the needs of another. But he may have his own desires and problems. He has the right to say no.
This is not a reason for conflict or breakup. Instead of turning a partner’s rejection into a drama, we recommend learning to be independent or asking friends, family or colleagues for help. The world does not end with a partner or spouse.
7. Set boundaries
More often relationships die from silence than from violence. Sometimes partners live too long, «biting» their tongues. You should not do this if one is not satisfied with the behavior of the other. This does not mean that you can «nag» or force another.
In order to keep the peace and bring relations to another, more advanced level, one should talk about what does not suit partners. Saying «no» is also a talent. But he can be learned. You must not allow yourself to be treated with disdain.
8. Never encourage bad habits.
Psychology can explain bad behavior, but it doesn’t justify it.
If a partner was stingy with encouragement, in the hope that the beloved will change for the better, limiting emotional communication, but this did not work, it’s time to change the rules and habits. What love could not change, sometimes easily changes the independence of another.
9. Trust the wisdom of your inner voice
When a relationship in a couple is in crisis, you can turn to friends and family for advice. But the cacophony of opinions is likely to drown out the only voice that really matters, your own.
In such a situation, it is better to lie low, to be alone in order to be able to comprehend what is happening. We advise you to protect your own mental space from the interference of others in order to be able to hear your intuition and slowly answer important questions.
- Should these relationships be saved?
- Do they match your interests and expectations?
- Do they contribute to your personal growth?
The soul will never let you down if you learn to listen to it.
10. Be patient, but know when to stop.
Patience must also have limits. To understand if the end has come to him, it is necessary to analyze the actions of the partner, and there will be a hint in them.
- Does he seek to resolve the conflict?
- Is he trying to change things?
- Or good intentions remain only in words?
Each person has only one life. Don’t waste it on illusions and empty promises.
Relationships are sometimes like old shoes. People should not stay in them if they have fallen apart just because they are comfortable.