How to determine compatibility
Full compatibility of a man and a woman (psychological, sexual and partnership) is the key to a long, strong and successful relationship. It is important that compatibility should be manifested not only in any one area of \u200b\u200blife. For example, sexual compatibility will no longer be of such great importance a few years after the start of a relationship, when psychological and partner compatibility comes to the fore.
As a rule, at the first stage of the development of relations between a man and a woman, sexual attraction plays a decisive role. Therefore, the sexual compatibility of partners is determined most simply after the first physical intimacy.
Compatibility in love, of course, is very important, because without it it is impossible to achieve emotional and intimate harmony. However, it does not yet guarantee mutual understanding and successful overcoming of joint life difficulties.
If, due to misunderstandings, you are constantly at war and your strife subsides only in bed, try to determine your compatibility on other levels of relationships.
Take a piece of paper and divide it into two parts. In the left column, list all the traits of your partner that annoy you, and in the right column, list the traits that you like.
The definition of character compatibility is that now you need to decide which characteristics your partner has more — which annoy you or which you like. Think about what negative aspects of your partner’s character you are ready to put up with and what not, while keeping in mind that it is your subjective assessment that is important in the process of conducting the test.
For example, for most people, the reason for parting is unlikely to be the fact that your partner constantly forgets to close the tube of toothpaste. But the presence of pathological greed in a partner is a reason to think. Although, if at the same time you yourself prefer austerity, this character trait of a partner can turn into a plus for you.
This test is especially good to carry out together with a partner, and then compare the results.
The main component of a successful relationship between a man and a woman is psychological compatibility. It can be determined in the following way. Draw on paper a scale of your values in descending order, putting the most important thing for you in life (family, money or career, etc.) as the first item. Then list on paper the responsibilities of each spouse and your socio-political views. Ask your partner to do the same and compare the results.
The compatibility of a man and a woman in this case is determined not by a complete match on all counts (which is unlikely), but by their similarity. For example, it is good when partners give priority to the same things in life. But if for one partner the main thing in life is a career, and for another family, we can say that this is already ready ground for disagreement. Also, the reason for misunderstanding is different views on the duties of the spouses, and sometimes even on the socio-political situation in the country.
An important role in successful relationships is played by partnership compatibility — the ability of a man and a woman to manage a family budget, to interact effectively in the process of making money and using it.
Partner incompatibility can be indicated, for example, by different views on spending money. To test your partner’s compatibility in this matter, try making a family budget plan and then compare it with your partner’s. Evaluate the rationality of the proposed expenses in the partner’s budget and compare them with your ideas about the necessary expenses.
Advice 2: How to determine the compatibility of people
Definition of compatibility of people is of serious interest to those who decide to start a family. This question has many ways to resolve it, including astrology, palmistry, numerology and other tricky theories. However, important for of people the criteria are still psychology and physiology.
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Quickly identify compatibility of people It doesn’t work, it’s a long and tedious process. But if you have decided on a serious step called «marriage», perhaps you should not neglect this.
Many people rely primarily on love, i.e. surrender to passion, give vent to their feelings. Unfortunately, hasty relationships very often turn out to be short-lived, and couples break up without having time to get used to each other.
Evaluate the factors that could influence the development and formation of the personality of your potential partner. These are heredity, upbringing, psychological type, level of development and goals pursued (a look into the future).
Look at your partner’s parents, because it is the biological and moral heredity that forms a person as a person in the first years of life and forever. Consequently, he acquires many qualities from those of peoplewho were always by his side. In addition, follow the relationship in his family, because in the same way, most likely, your friend / girlfriend will try to build a way of your own. Is it right for you?
Pay attention to how he/she behaves in the company of others of people. Does it matter to you how he/she does it and what he says, does it match how you see him/her in private. After all, at the stage of formation of your relationship there is an element of pretense, the desire to appear better. However, in the future it will disappear and you will see the real person. Do not think that you will be able to re-educate a partner, this is a common misconception.
Determine the psychological type of a person’s personality. There are quite a few of them, and each psychologist interprets differently. For example, Jung identified four main types: sensing, intuitive, thinking, and feeling. These types can be expanded to eight, if we recall the now very popular division of people into extroverts (open) and introverts (closed).
Invite your partner to take a psychological test with you. This exciting activity may well amuse both of you, but do not forget to call him to seriousness from time to time. Do several different tests to be more sure that your friend / girlfriend did not lie. As a rule, such tests involve type compatibility casting.
Very often, couples break up due to differences in levels of development. This personality indicator has two aspects: the main criterion and the indicator of the development of the personality base. The first includes the choice and degree of development of a life position, the level of responsibility (responsible for his actions or avoids it), the level of adulthood (infantility, adulthood, a growing or fading personality), the position of perception (is the partner able to look at the situation from different points of view).
The indicator of the development of the personal base is a rather voluminous tool aimed at determining the qualities and abilities of a person. For example, the level of mental health (neurotic or capable of self-control), culture (literacy, endurance, obedience to generally accepted norms of behavior in society), intelligence (stupid, smart, wise).
No less important are such qualities as the ability to empathize and repentance, tolerance towards others, the ability to make a choice independently, etc.
And finally, it is necessary to find out what goals the partner sets for himself, and determine how they are in harmony with your own, because living together will make them common. It is extremely difficult to change the position and aspirations of another person.
It may seem that all of the above implies an ideal person, which does not exist in nature. However, this is not about searching for perfection, but only about what suits you personally. Unless you’re really worried about some of the flaws that don’t fit into the reference model, ignore them. The main thing is that you are impressed by his / her dignity, as well as the attitude towards you. After all, you are not perfect either.
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